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My first book and I was in love with it. If I had the money as Gide had I would have published it at my own expense. If I had had the courage that Whitman had I would have peddled it from door to door. Everybody I showed it to said it was terrible. I was urged to give up the idea of writing. I had to learn as Balzac did that one must write volumes before signing one's own name. I had to leam as I soon did that one must give up everything and not do anything else but write that one must write and write and write even if everybody in the world advises you against it even if nobody believes in you. Perhaps one does it just because nobody believes; perhaps the real secret lies in making people believe. That the book was inadequate faulty bad terrible as they said.
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